Homesick for Heaven

O God, Dear God-
Thank you that you are my God. You are so great, mighty, and loving. I have no word elegant enough, no emotion deep enough, no thought pure enough, no action great enough to even begin to communicate how wonderful you are.
There are times when I feel so homesick. I long to be with you. I long to hear your voice speak to me. Will you say, "You are my son that I love. With you I am well pleased."?
I want to feel your arms enclosing around me. Then I will know what love, being warm, secure, and forgiven truly means.
When I see you what will I feel, what will I think? After all it was I that nailed you to the cross. It was I that spat on you. It was I that made fun of you, cursed you, pushed the thorns onto your head. It was I that made you bleed. You were shamed and humiliated. It was I that made you feel that way. It was I that drove the nails into you body and thrust the spear into your side. And then I tried to forget you.
You rose on Sunday, and though I tried to forget you, you remembered me. It was you who sought me out. It was you who opened my mind and touched my heart. It was you that wouldn't quit on me.
It was you that told me that you forgave me. When I heard, "I love you.", it was your voice. It was you who took my guilt and shame. It was you who took my broken and incomplete life and made it like new and complete. It was you that looked past what I looked like and into my soul and filled the empty spot.
And still I am not sure all you have done. You are so great, your ways are not mine. You are holy, and I am not. You are blameless, and I am sinful. Why you chose me I do not know, I do not understand. What is it that you see in me that makes me worthy of you?
I love you, and miss you. I want to see you, I want to touch you. I want to talk to you and sit by your side. I want to come home. I am homesick.